Title: "Unrequited Love"
Author: Gillian Taylor
E-Mail Address: USSTrustNo1@hotmail.com
Rating: PG-13
Category: S
Spoilers: Up to and including Season 6
Keywords: Mulder/Scully UST
Summary: The pain of unrequited love can be brought on by the simplest of phrases.

Disclaimer: Ahem. Let's just put it this way. I don't own them. I never have and never will. If I did, I'd be able to retire early. I'm just playing with them for a while. They'll be back before dinner-time, Mr. Carter.

Author's Notes: I'm trying something new in this story. This is an attempt at another style of writing. We shall see if this works. Special thanks go to my betas- Crysta, Astoria, and Mrs. H and to my friends and crew on the USS TrustNo1. The Lone Gunpersons rule!

"Unrequited Love"
by Gillian Taylor

I cried again tonight. I've done the same thing every night for as long as I can remember. For as long as it has been since you uttered the words that shattered my heart and shattered my life.

It was such a simple phrase to use. Simple yet deadly. It hurt me badly--in fact so badly that I couldn't work with you anymore. Seeing you, and yet being unable to touch you hurt more than words can say.

Oh why? Why did I have to be cursed with this emotion? Feeling something that only I felt? Something that could not be, or perhaps never was, reciprocated. I know that you care about me. I've known it from the beginning, but to find out now that you don't feel same type of emotion as I...it broke my heart.

The tattered remains of my dignity are still lying on the floor in our office. Perhaps they will always be there. I lived there with you, living your dream, fighting your fight. I was stupid to believe that you would feel the same way. My composure melted completely. And now all that's left of it is mush.

I wonder when this feeling will end. When this near-constant ache that I feel in my heart with disappear. Will be with the change of tides? Another day? A month? A year? Never? I have begun to think that the latter is the truth. I'll never be able to get over you.

Love is an emotion that's near impossible to overcome, especially when that emotion is based on friendship, trust, and a multitude of other emotions that lack definition. Why? Why did I have to see something that wasn't there? Why did I have to love you so much when all you saw me as was another woman. A chickadee to display to your friends over and over again.

I should hate you for what you did to me. I should curse your name to my dying breath. But I can't. Your memory still holds that much power over me. When I close my eyes, all I can see still is your hazel eyes staring into mine. With each breath, all I can feel is the familiar brush of your hand on my back, an area that I've long since come to think of as yours.

The tears are now a constant companion to my grief. I live in a darkened room now; the only source of light is the flare of my cigarette as I draw in the comforting smoke. It has become a strange imitation of life. Eat, drink, bathe, smoke, cry--this is my life now that you are no longer there.

All that's left of your impact in my life are memories now. Perhaps these too will disappear in the haze of time. I can only hope that the grief that I feel will become muted in time. It's agony now that you're gone. And there's nothing that I can do to bring you back to me.

I still love you. And I always will. But now, now those looks. That intense stare that you would direct into my eyes, that familiar brush of a hand on the small of my back--those touches, those looks, belong to her now.

It hurts. It hurts more than I can say. And all you had to tell me was simple--a single phrase uttered with no regard for my feelings.

All you had to say was:

"Agent Fowley, meet Agent Scully--my partner."

THE END

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